Polly…

So I’ve been thinking – is it a bad thing to be in a polyamorous relationship?

Here’s my problem: I was raised in a Catholic school for 8 years. Our family (mom and dad are drunks – let’s be real) would go to church every Sunday. PLUS in school we would go on Wednesdays AND we had Religion classes.

So yea. Brainwash central.

I was taught that man and women were a couple, marriage was forever and holy. blah, blah, blah. You know the rest.

Now I’ve not been to church in GOD knows when – ZOMG! A ironic JOKE! – and in fact the last time I was there was when we were having a funeral for him.

Yet there’s still this block in my mind that prevents it to being truly open about things.

She tells me she loves him. She tells me she loves me. I love her. I love him.

But there’s still something holding me back!

Is it the brainwashing that I had done at an early age? If you don’t really believe in the Catholic God but believe that there is, indeed, a “supreme being” wouldn’t that being want you to just be happy? I mean being happy is good for you! Happy and love are the two best feelings in the world!

So what is it? What’s wrong with me?

You should find it ironic that someone who others would consider “normal” asks what is wrong with him when he thinks having more than one lover is perfectly fine – and that it doesn’t matter if it’s a man or a woman.

That part scares the “normal” me. It excites the “abnormal” me.

So who do I let win?

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One Response to “Polly…”

  1. It’s hard to say what the right thing is because a part of you is listening to the old patterning and the other part is interested in trying a new pattern.
    Y
    ou may want to consider the eventual outcome of a 3 partner relationship before making a decision. Some of my mental health friends have said that one person usually gets hurt in a 3 some.

    Why don’t you meditate on it? You may be giving into your sexual energies rather then your spirituality and this may be the crux of your confusion. I am not religious at all so I am not coming from this point of view, but I do know that for male’s sex is a determining factor for many of their decisions and when this happens, it usually isn’t pretty.

    Blessings

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